New Age Narcissists, Money & Manifesting


There seems to be a breed of new age/’spiritual’ people that embrace a way of being that seems to ignore the need for self-reliance and the ability to hold a ‘Big Picture’ view of relating to humanity when it comes to money/finances

Why this is up for me is…
my roommate and I invited someone into our home (who seemed to have fallen on hard times) that could ‘parrot’ spiritual concepts (but it turned out the actual living of them was not a daily activity). Anyway, there was an exchange arranged for the rent and actual payment required for utilities. End result…,
after six weeks – no money and minimal exchange. Apparently we were her personal agent of the Divine to meet her want/need (in this case)
Our request for her to fulfill her commitment was met with accusations, insults and anger. We share space no longer.

I don’t believe the Divine requires me to be the provider for someone’s wants/needs based on their whim or a desire to be rescued from their own doings. The process of someone just simply ‘taking’ is called stealing – not manifesting.

I’m ok with being a tool of the Divine (it’s what I try to do… and will continue to do, regardless of some ‘negative’ experiences). How it has worked for me in the past is usually someone is put in my path plus the ‘desire to help’ at the very same time. When someone tries to tell me that the Divine whats me to do something (anything), red flags go up. The Divine tends to give me a ‘heads up’ first.
Historically speaking, it usually doesn’t usually work out so well for folks when there is a middleman between the Divine and the seeker.

I believe the healthy approach to ‘conscious selfishness’ really is one of self-preservation, self-growth and… in doing so, being open to how one can one provide for others in the midst of that very pursuit – interdependancy.
I believe its unhealthy to have the mindset of I gotta ‘get mine’…
(irregardless of consequence for one’s self and others)
It’s pretty hard to ‘be of service’ with this attitude, and, fully experience what the Divine can do in your life.

~kenji

*Definition of Narcissism: the personality trait of egotism, vanity, conceit, or simple selfishness. Applied to a social group, it is sometimes used to denote elitism or an indifference to the plight of others.
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**Reference – Hotchkiss’ seven deadly sins of narcissism

1. Shamelessness – Shame is the feeling that lurks beneath all unhealthy narcissism, and the inability to process shame in healthy ways.
2. Magical thinking – Narcissists see themselves as perfect using distortion and illusion known as magical thinking. They also use projection to dump shame onto others.
3. Arrogance – A narcissist who is feeling deflated may re-inflate by diminishing, debasing, or degrading somebody else.
4. Envy – A narcissist may secure a sense of superiority in the face of another person’s ability by using contempt to minimize the other person.
5. Entitlement – Narcissists hold unreasonable expectations of particularly favorable treatment and automatic compliance because they consider themselves special. Any failure to comply will be considered an attack on their superiority and the perpetrator is considered to be an “awkward” or “difficult” person. Defiance of their will is a narcissistic injury that can trigger narcissistic rage.
6. Exploitation – can take many forms but always involves the exploitation of others without regard for their feelings or interests. Often the other is in a subservient position where resistance would be difficult or even impossible. Sometimes the subservience is not so much real as assumed.
7. Bad Boundaries – narcissists do not recognize that they have boundaries and that others are separate and are not extensions of themselves. Others either exist to meet their needs or may as well not exist at all. Those who provide narcissistic supply to the narcissist will be treated as if they are part of the narcissist and be expected to live up to those expectations. In the mind of a narcissist, there is no boundary between self and other.

Winds of Change

The winds of change are stirring the air about me,
…and things are moving – a dance of a different energy
I believe the Universe is conspiring (in a good way)
It reminds me of the moods of Esalen
My curiosity is up as to what will unfold

Bali, Japan & Beyond

It was around this time last year that I left the dolphins of Big Island for Japan, and…, ultimately – Bali. I’m really missing it. Travel is a tiring affair but the jewels found in the process make it worth it

My 2 weeks in Japan were very busy. The first 2 pit stops were in Tokyo and Kyoto on my way to Matsuyama (not so very far from Hiroshima). My stay in Matsuyama was all about doing sessions, a combination of bodywork and teaching (life coach). I completed 18 sessions in 5 days (with another 4 in the following week). After Matsuyama, it was on to Osaka where I stayed with a sweet woman who taught traditional Japanese weaving (on a loom). It was another new way to be in the moment. I really enjoyed it but it was off to the airport and on to Bali.

Wow, Bali…. I couldn’t stop smiling for a week. It was natural… there something about the energy of the place and it’s Magical Rice Fields. I was there to take a dance facilitation workshop and a month long workshop to add to my Esalen Massage certification training so that I could get their piece of paper saying that I did it, then I could hang on the wall with my others. most of my time was spent near Ubud at Ananda Cottages which as the universe would have it, got me an awesome room.

Anyway… Bali & Japan are in my blood now and I hope to return sometime this year. If not, then I hope to bring them to me in Hawaii. During this year, as I build an energetic anchor (home base) here in Kauai, I hope to create a healing space for myself and any who would venture here

Blessings
~kenji

Dude-ist?

Seems like as I continue to refine my personal definition of spirituality, I see a lot of the patriarchal leanings still exist in organized religions. Its like… the penis is supposed to be the ‘rod of wisdom’.
I’ve got one… and trust me, it isn’t.

.
Be the religion:

Dude-ist… (aka Buddhist)
Him-Du… (aka Hindu)
Christ-Him… (aka Christian)
other Man-stream Religions (mainstream)

Don’t get me wrong, I have more in common with the first two as they’re a closer match to my own philosophy but in the ‘organized part’ – they still have heavy leanings toward the patriarchal (masculine). This mystifies me so many agree that it takes both Yin & Yang (feminine & masculine) to achieve any semblance of balance.

I’d love to see an opening of arms toward the re-emerging goddess (feminine) energy so that it comes into our conscious as a gradual integration rater than having to reach the strength of a tsunami to create change. Either way will effect the needed change but the turbulence of a such wave can be rough on those who are unprepared.

So awakening goddesses, dance a new dance with the masculine, one of power coupled with grace, seduction with wisdom and knowledge with nurturing giving birth to a new world

~kenji

In The Flow..

So I will stay here at Esalen in Big Sur, CA… I have been accepted to the 1 year work-study program at Esalen and I am excited (with some trepidation) and look forward to a year of growth plus living in community while working & settling back into my body as well as growing from the inside out… digging deep in a place that allows it.

~Nurtured~
by the Sea,
by the Land,
by the People.

It is way past the time for me to regroup. I’ve shared precious little of the turbulent past year. I feel beaten and tired but definitely not defeated. The hard times have produced wondrous growth and lessons that will be the foundation for my next adventures in life. Already the stage is set with new folk that have already crossed my path reinforcing the value of interdependence.

I am hoping some will choose to visit as it is a great place to see (so contact me if you’re up for it) When I finally do leave.., I hope to bring a contagious loving attitude and energy to all encounter.

I look forward to where my feet will land next (possibly Japan, HI, CA-SF, AZ & OR) and have high hopes of meeting many of you face to face so I can truly know you beyond the cyber & energetic connection we already have. I will have spotty access to the internet here at Esalen so if you want to connect via that avenue, please be patient.

—> I truly have LOVE for those I have connected with as fellow sojourners on this planet.

Take care, and, namaste
(which as I understand it means the god in me acknowledges and recognizes the god in you)

~kenji

This Momentous Day

Four years ago today was when I almost left this planet when I wrecked my motorcycle*. Today, I so wanted to celebrate life with someone (or someones, even anyone) but when I looked around, I found I have no friends. My ‘prewreck’ life was spent running business and making the ‘good life’ so coveted by the world but in doing this solo ended up making me an unintentional hermit, which is the opposite of who I am.

To date, post-wreck life has been a time of trials & blessings, of dreams dying, of learning & growing but still…, the isolation, both by where I live and a lack of a circle of friends. I feel great things on the horizon but it has been a year of limbo. I am lost and lonely. I need laughter, conversation. touch, motion, action, community, you know…, the give and take of it all – the energy of beings in close proximity of each other.

So any advice (other than ‘get out there’ because I don’t know where ‘there’ is) and insights would be appreciated because I feel caged and trapped though I know I am free

~kenji

New Light Being

Originally I was going to keep this to myself out of fear of judgment, both of me, the child and the couple involved but I felt so blessed for being part of their journey that I wanted to share. I was the sperm donor for an awesome lesbian couple who had their little girl on January 6th 2007. They are so excited and in love with this child that I can’t help but smile. They have committed to send me pictures now and then as she grows. I ask you send good energy the child’s way that she will be the nexus of light for the family